Capital Return Program

The Treasury

The Corporation keeps one wallet, publishes its address, and reports what is in it whether or not the figure is flattering.

Holdings

TREASURY STATEMENT (PARODY) — FILED CONTINUOUSLY

Read from Robinhood Chain in your browser and recomputed every sixty seconds. The Corporation maintains no facility to adjust these figures and did not commission one.

Treasury Balance

Treasury Holding of $BAGS

Registrar & Transfer Data
ItemParticulars
Treasury & Deployer
Security
Chain
Sell facility None. None built, none contemplated.
Function Receives creator fees; buys on the open market; retires what the policy requires

One address deploys the security, receives the fees, and administers the Capital Return Program set out below. It is a one-way valve: it buys and it retires. It has no facility to sell, and the code contains no sell function. The Corporation states this here because it is checkable at the address above, by anyone, at any hour, without asking the Corporation anything. An assurance that cannot be checked is not a disclosure, and the Corporation does not trade in assurances.

Capital Structure

Supply figures are read from the token contract. Retired supply is the balance of the burn address itself, not a tally the Corporation has kept of its own conduct.

Total Supply

Circulating Supply

Permanently Retired

Particulars of the Capital Structure
ItemParticulars
Insider ownership at issuance A founder’s allocation of approximately 1.3%, purchased on the open market at issuance. No allocation is minted to any party — not to the treasury, not to the operator, not to anyone. The position is earmarked to fund the Corporation’s exchange listing obligations and will be sold for that purpose. Every other token the treasury holds arrives by open-market purchase that anyone may watch happen at the address above.
Liquidity Locked by the launchpad at the offering. The Corporation holds no withdrawal key and cannot remove it. Pool:
Trading fee — the 11% Every trade is taxed 11%, and the Corporation would rather set it out than have it found on a scanner. 1% is the launchpad’s curve fee, which the Corporation does not set. 10% is the creator tax, which the Corporation did set, at the protocol maximum, before launch. It was written into the token at issuance and cannot be lowered — not by the Corporation, not by anyone; the contract contains no function to do it, which is checkable.

Of the eleven points: the launchpad retains 0.3 and the treasury receives 10.7. Under the split below, roughly 6.4 of the 11 points return to the token as open-market purchase and permanent retirement.
Creator-fee split 60% Capital Return Program (open-market purchase and retirement)    40% retained as operating income. Executed from the published address above and reported after the fact.

The Corporation’s exchange listing obligation (DexScreener Enhanced Token Info, approximately $300) is funded first, out of fees, before any retirement begins. Burning before the listing is paid would destroy the money that pays for the listing, and the listing is what lets anyone find the security at all. The Corporation would rather state that plainly than quietly do it in the wrong order.
Distributions to holders None. The retirement is the distribution.
Burn address 0x000000000000000000000000000000000000dEaD — retired supply is permanently removed and permanently visible

A figure the Corporation cannot yet read is printed as “—” and retried at the next refresh. It is never printed as zero. A zero that means “we could not read it” is a different statement from a zero that means “there is none,” and the Corporation declines to let the two share a typeface.

Capital Return Program

POLICY SCHEDULE — PUBLISHED BEFORE THE OFFERING

Creator fees accumulate in ETH. At each published threshold the treasury spends a fixed share of accumulated fees buying $BAGS on the open market, permanently retires a fixed share of what it bought, and files a report giving the amount spent, the amount bought, the amount retired, and the transaction hashes.

Schedule of Thresholds
Filing Threshold (FDV) Fees deployed Of tokens bought, retired Status
Capital Return Program I $50,00025%50% Not yet due
Capital Return Program II $100,00035%60% Not yet due
Capital Return Program III $250,00050%70% Not yet due
Capital Return Program IV $500,00050%80% Not yet due
Capital Return Program V $1,000,00060%90% Not yet due
How a programme is recorded here
A programme reads “Not yet due” until it has been executed and filed. On execution the row is amended to “Executed” and carries the date of the filing, and the filing itself gives the transaction hashes. The Corporation does not mark a programme executed in advance of executing it.
Why the status is not computed from the price on this page
The thresholds above are denominated in dollars. This page reads the pool and can state the valuation in ETH exactly; converting that to dollars would require an off-chain price source, and this page contacts nothing but the chain. The Corporation would rather publish a figure it can prove than a figure it has borrowed.
Each threshold fires once
Ever. A threshold crossed, retreated from, and crossed again does not entitle anyone to a second programme, and the schedule above is not re-armed.
A wick is not a valuation
Two consecutive readings above a threshold are required before the treasury acts, so a single block cannot trigger a programme.
The thresholds do not move
They were published before the offering, which is what distinguishes this from a discretionary buyback announced by a party who already knew it was coming. The whole value of the policy is that it is fixed and checkable.
Why only a portion is retired
The unretired remainder stays in the treasury as a permanent, publicly-visible position the Corporation never sells. A treasury that retired everything would have nothing left to show for its conviction.

Market Valuation

Read from the liquidity pool itself, in the same block it happens. The Corporation reports the valuation and is not permitted to characterise it.

Price

Fully Diluted Valuation

The treasury reports at the offering.

Note from Investor Relations I am required to publish the balance of a wallet I administer and am given no facility to flatter it, an arrangement I understand to be the entire point and which I would like the minutes to show I raised anyway. Should the treasury spend a great deal of ETH and retire a disappointing quantity of supply, this page will report both figures, side by side, in this typeface, at the usual hour, and nobody will consult me first. I asked whether the retired total might be presented cumulatively, on a chart, with a favourable axis. I was told the chain already keeps the total and does not offer an axis.*  *I also proposed that the treasury be permitted to sell a small amount, once, in an emergency. The request was denied on the grounds that this is the one promise the Corporation actually keeps, and the reply was laminated before I had finished reading it.